Time To Update.

But there’s not much to say.

11:22pm

I am freezing today. Not sure why. I’m sure the cold water that I’m drinking doesn’t help, but I don’t think that’s all of it, either. It just seems colder in the house today, and yesterday, though I would imagine that it’s still basically the same temperature in here. Maybe it’s colder outside than normal, I haven’t really been keeping track.

For the mostpart, I still haven’t been doing much of anything. I did a little Path of Exile yesterday, and watched some videos the day before, but that’s about it really. For the mostpart, I have still been sitting here and doing not much of anything.

I suppose it’s probably depression that is causing it. I need to get back into doing stuff. I really want to. I would love to do some more game playing and video watching. Kinda get back to my old self. That would be nice.

I’m thinking about heading into bed early and firing up the Chromebook for a while. It would warm me up, at least. It’s not like I’m doing much else, anyways.

Really, not much has gone on, which is not a bad thing. Just means I don’t have a whole lot to talk about, I suppose. At least, I can’t think of anything else to add for now. I will try to update more, though. I think this is like the first one of the year and that’s not good.

Anyways, I suppose it’s time to wander off. I will hopefully be back tomorrow. Maybe I’ll even do something.

The Year Is Over.

Well, it about 38 minutes, at least, here.

11:22pm

Don’t remember posting last night. Thought all I was doing was watching videos. Silly me.

Didn’t do too much today. Hope to change things up a bit in the new year, maybe get some gaming going. I did play a little bit of Path Of Exile today, but not much.

That’s about the long and the short of it today. I keep being hot and then cold and it’s not much fun. Danzig is hacking every once in a while, not sure why.

I guess I had less to say than I thought, and I haven’t even been drinking yet.

Oh well, time to change that.

Almost New Years.

It’s true.

3:05am

I don’t have much to say tonight. Not much has gone on. Today, tonight, or whatever is the end of the year. I will say that 2018 has gone by faster than I expected it to.

I’m gonna get my crunk on tonight, at least a little bit.

Gonna get some alcohol again tomorrow. Just some campaign, though, most likely.

I don’t have much to say tonight. I’ve been watching some videos, and soon, I am going to go to bed. Maybe not soon enough.

I suppose I’m done for tonight. Like I said, I have very little to say tonight.

Tomorrow, maybe that’s something else. For now, I am going to wander off. Pretty sad, I guess. For now, I will wander off.

Still Christmas.

For a little bit, at least.

11:22pm

Here we are, at the end of another Christmas. I’ve basically been alone all day. I mean, the cats have been here, and my mom brought presents over, but besides that, I’ve been all by myself. Not even sure when that is going to change. I would imagine not too long from now, but I suppose we will see.

Didn’t do much today, mostly just watching videos. I suppose I could have streamed again, but I would definitely have been all alone in there. Plus, I didn’t know when they would be coming home. I should have assumed it would be late, though. Oh well.

I suppose today hasn’t been too bad. I probably should have unloaded and reloaded the dishwasher, but I didn’t. I suppose I should do that tomorrow. We are kinda out of clean plates.

It seems like I had more to say a little while ago, but I’m not sure if that’s actually true, or I’m just telling myself that. I apparently don’t have a whole lot to talk about right now, though.

I suppose I could talk about my left shoulder being fucked up, though it’s feeling okay right now. I think due to some combination of the way that I prefer to lay in bed, and the positions I put myself in when half sleeping in here have done a number on it. It tends to hurt at night. It’s not so bad during the day, when I’ve just got my arms sitting on the arms of my chair, but when I go to stretch out and get comfy in bed, it doesn’t feel so good. The worst part is that at night, when it feels best is when I am laying on my left side. I have a hard time getting comfortable laying on that side, and have a really hard time sleeping that way. Of course. I hope this isn’t going to be a permanent problem. That would not be fun.

I’m also having a problem with my jaw, because I keep moving it around, playing with and sometimes grinding my teeth. I don’t know why I’ve been doing that, but I’ve been doing that for like the past couple months. Maybe a bit longer. It’s starting to take its toll, though. It doesn’t feel too bad today, but I’ve been trying to make an effort to stop fucking around with it. We’ll see how long that lasts, though.

I suppose that’s a couple things that I had been thinking about posting about for a little while now. I guess it’s good to finally get them out. Well, I suppose, at least. Although, I think that means that I’ve run out of stuff to talk about for now. I can’t really think of anything else to add.

I think that after they get home, I will go in and lay in bed and watch videos all comfy and cozy under the comforter. I’ve been kinda chilly today and that will feel very nice. Sometimes I think about bringing my old comforter in here and just keeping it in the office, but sometimes Shem lays on it where it is right now, though, it’s pretty rare. He probably wouldn’t mind if I moved it. It sounds like a good idea, at least. We will see.

Okay, I suppose this is the end now. I have no more to give tonight. Maybe I’ll come up with something for tomorrow. It could happen. Or I could forget to post for a few days, like I have been again. For a while there, I was doing pretty good in posting every day. I should really make an effort to get back to that.

For now, however, I am off. To do what, I’m not sure.

Almost Christmas.

It’s true.

4:13pm

So, I’m all alone until some time tomorrow. I’m thinking about maybe streaming tonight. I mean, it’s not like I have much better things to do, and I have a pretty good opportunity to do it tonight. Of course, probably no one will show up, but it wouldn’t be a first time.

There hasn’t been too much else going on in the past few days. Yesterday was football day, of course. Those are starting to run out. Only one more week of the regular season left. Next weekend, we will see if the Colts actually make it to the playoffs.

I shaved today, at least for the mostpart. It had been a while, and it was bugging me, so I decided to finally do it. Felt okay, I guess. I’m glad I did it, so, I guess that’s good.

I guess I don’t have much else to say right now, so I will wander off and see what’s what for a while. I thought this might be longer, but I really don’t have all that much for you right now. Keep an eye on twitter and see when and if I stream. It’ll be a good time, I’m sure. Well, I think.

Lack Of Streams.

It happens.

11:50pm (12/21)

So, the day will probably flip over before I get this finished, so I will go ahead and put the date up there, just so we’re all on the same page.

I didn’t stream tonight. I had thought about it, but things didn’t work out. Cable and I did play Path Of Exile for a while, though. Right up until the time I would have streamed. Then he went to bed. And for some reason, they have been sleeping with the door open, and I doubt they want to hear me babble on for hours while they are trying to sleep.

So, I decided against that and fired up a video. Seemed like a good idea, at least.

Plus, the lack of an audience thing kinda makes me feel silly streaming sometimes. Just playing a game and talking to myself. Of course, I upload all the streams to YouTube, but they don’t get views there, either. Maybe someday I’ll sit down and watch through them myself, just to get some views. I just don’t know if I really want to do that.

Really, besides PoE, I didn’t do too much today. Maybe I should have, but I’m not sure. There really wasn’t much to do today, so maybe I’m off the hook.

I’m thinking about packing up shop and going to lay down in bed with Danzig. He’s in there right now, snoozing away. I’m not really tired, at least, not physically, but I can still watch videos in there. I will think about it some more.

I suppose that’s about all I have to say for now. Maybe I can come up with something better tomorrow, though I don’t know what it might be. And I may take a hammer to my keyboard, though that’s probably not a good idea. Wish I knew what broke my spacebar. Oh well.

For now, I am going to wander off. Whether I watch videos in the office or in bed, I’m not sure. Maybe I’ll stay up for a little while longer. Hrmm.

Guess I made it in less than ten minutes. That’s good, I suppose.

A Learning Experience.

Today was.

1:18am

I have learned a lot today.

I have found that I can be as sad, and upset, and depressed, and crying as I want to be, and as long as it doesn’t impact anyone else, it’s fine.

It’s fine for everyone else, that is. Me, I’m still all fucked up. Doesn’t matter, though. Fucking stupid keyboard.

I tried to reach out tonight. More than once, but no one really gives a shit. I suppose I should be used to that. Every time I’ve tried to reach out, it’s just resulted in me being at least as bad as I was at the time, and sometimes even worse.

No one really cares, which is pretty sad. I suppose I should be used to that, though.

I feel stupid for even talking about this. You would think that the only one that really controls my life is me, but, to be quite honest, I don’t have that kind of control.

I had more to say, but I’m really not saying anything at this point, and my stupid space bar is keeping me from saying many things, sometimes.

Not that I have much to say. It’s not like anyone is listenting, anyways.

I wish things were different. I wish I wasn’t so reluctant to do anything. I want to do more, but I don’t know how. I try to do other shit, but anytime I do anything that’s not chores, I feel like I don’t deserve to do anything.

I suppose I should be happy that my garage door is fixed now, but I wasn’t really expecting to pay for all of that right now. I had to pay for the part, which I used cash to do, which was my weed money for the next couple weeks. Plus, I had to pay for the labor, which I didn’t have in my pocket, but I did have my checkbook for. Good times for everyone else, I suppose.

I guess that’s about all I have for now. My stupid keyboard fucking up, and my stupid brain fucking everything else up. I guess I will sit here, have a few drinks, and hope that things will be better tomorrow, even though I know they won’t.

I suppose for now, I will wander off, and pretend that everything is okay.

More Illness.

I automatically started typing Illus. How odd.

12:52am

So, today was another not great day. My stomach was hurting pretty bad when I went to bed last night, and had another night of mostly no sleep. Felt pretty bad for a good portion of the day today, but tonight I seem to be doing better. We will see what the morning brings, though.

Not only did I take my Nexium last night, I had to take some chewables this morning, because I had a big old ball of misery in the middle of my stomach this morning. That kinda cleared it up some, but not a whole lot. At least it’s over now.

Just been watching videos tonight, nothing too spectacular. I really need to get back into a game, whether it’s 76, or WoW, or FO4, or whatever, really. My WoW sub is ticking down and I haven’t been on in like two weeks. I suppose I should change that pretty soon. I don’t think I’ve been in 76 at all since the patch on the 11th. Maybe once, I don’t really remember. And I need to get some streaming in at some point. Maybe I can do that tomorrow.

Not a whole lot else to say. It was a more busy day than normal, of course, it had to be when I didn’t feel good. Oh well, it’s over now.

I’m thinking about going and laying down, but I’m not sure if I’m going to or not. I’m having a pretty good time with the videos that I’m watching in here. And yes, I probably could look them up on the Chromebook, but they’re Twitch VOD’s and I don’t know how well the ol’ Chromebook will handle Twitch. I guess I should find out sometime.

For now, I guess I am going to wander off and go back to my videos. I’m feeling tired, so maybe I’ll get some actual sleep tonight. That would be nice. I think I got like an hour and a half of sleep, from like 7 to 8:30 this morning, and that’s about it. I could really go for a full nights rest.

So, I am off. I shall see you later.

Couple Not Great Days.

Could have been worse, though, really.

12:10am

I am not feeling well, and not in the ‘I drank too much’ way, either. It’s something with my stomach, and it ain’t great. It didn’t help that I didn’t get much sleep last night, either. Hopefully, I can get some sleep in tonight and will feel better tomorrow.

Besides that, it’s been rather quiet lately. Just mostly watching video. I don’t if I mentioned it, but they keep having all sorts of time limited stuff in the 76 Atomic store. Don’t know how I feel about that. I mean, you only get so many Atoms while you’re playing. I mean, I know you pretty much always get at least a few, but still, kinda annoying.

Well, I really don’t have a whole lot else to say, I suppose. I’m thinking I may go and lay down early, but we will see. For now, I am going to sit back and do some relaxing. Night.