Tonight’s Post.

It’s kinda late.

3:44am

It’s late, and I don’t have a whole lot to say.

I’ve been watching some videos. Some Fallout 4, and a little bit of Fallout 76. I’ve seen some things that I didn’t see while I was playing. I’m not sure if that’s good or bad, though.

I will say this, I did do my World Quests in WoW today. I’m getting close to those damn Void Elves, but it’s gonna take most of a week to finish it off, and that’s if I do it every day, and the likelihood of that is not great.

Also, I drank a whole bottle today, but I’m not nearly close enough to drunk. And certainly not drunk enough to sleep well tonight. I didn’t sleep well last night, either. Danzig was busy being a pain in the ass last night. That didn’t help me at all.

I feel like I should have more to talk about, but I don’t, really. Well, there is one thing. Hellgate: London was released on Steam this week, and I went ahead and bought it. I probably shouldn’t have, but I did anyways. I also have it on Origin, but I don’t think it’s the updated version. There’s no multiplayer, but I never really cared about that for H:L in the first place.

I didn’t play it today. Things kinda got jumbled up today, but maybe tomorrow. We will see.

I suppose that’s all I have for tonight. It’s almost bedtime, and we will see how that works. Not well, I’m guessing. I could be wrong, though.

For now, I guess I will wander off and get ready for bed. If I think about it, I will let you know how that goes.

Post Number Three!

But no video this time. 

11:06pm

So, as you saw, I got a stream in today. I’m liking Fallout 76 so far. I haven’t found any Power Armor yet, but hopefully I will at some point. We found where one of them is located the other day, but there was no armor there. It was almost sad.

Right now, I’m well, posting, I guess. I was going to say watching videos. I’m kinda thinking about playing something, but I’m not sure what. I’ve thought about World Of Warcraft, Fallout 4, Fallout 76, Pokemon Blue, and a Diablo 1 mod called The Hell 2. Of course, when I get in a mode like this, I usually end up just doing nothing and continuing to watch videos.

We’ll see what what I end up doing sooner or later, I suppose. I really should do some World Quests tomorrow, so I may save WoW until then. I mean, I could do some tonight, I suppose, but I prefer doing that earlier in the day. I’m not sure why, but I do.

I have to admit, I was pretty surprised when 76 locked up my computer. I mean, it locked the whole thing up, not just 76. I mean I had to actually turn the computer off and back on. That was a pretty hard lock. Then Windows decided it needed to do something while it was starting up. It took a couple minutes to get back to the stream, but it wasn’t too bad.

Then, right near the end of the stream, I went to do something, and the Scorched that I was supposed to kill was already dead. Apparently, someone had done that pretty recently and it hadn’t respawned yet. I thought about logging out right there, but I didn’t. I went back to my camp. If you watch the vids, you’ll see me being dumb a little. I forgot that fast travel was a thing in 76, because it’s not in Fallout 4 survival mode. I got used to walking everywhere. I eventually remembered, though.

It seems like I had something else to say tonight, but I have lost it since I got sidetracked by Twitter a minute ago. How sad for me. I hope it wasn’t anything too important.

Well, I guess I’m done for now. My mind is a blank. I suppose I will go back to my vids and think about what I might want to do tonight. So, I will take my leave, but I will leave this here for you:

Callidara in the middle of nowhere.

Sooo. Another Night.

It is.

3:24am

I don’t have much to say.

Really, I don’t have anything to say.

Tonight is a night, and I didn’t do anything. Maybe I should have played some 76, but I didn’t. I was waiting for Auren, but he was doing other stuff tonight.

And maybe that’s just my problem, but I didn’t want to stream to no one.

Maybe I should have played anyways, but I didn’t. I guess that’s okay, because I was drinking. I did do my World Quests in WoW today, though, so that’s something. I’m getting kinda close. I only need like…six more days of World Quests on Argus to get the Void Elves unlocked. Then, I need to do a bunch of stuff to get the Dark Iron Dwarves unlocked, which is what I really wanted to do in the first place.

Anyways, I did some shit, but not enough. And for right now, I’m pretty drunk. Not super drunk, and not as drunk as maybe I would like. But, at this point, I suppose I don’t have much else to talk about.

Maybe tomorrow I will have more to speak about, and maybe some 76 stuff. We will see.

For now, I’m going to wander off and go to bed. Goodnight and all of that.

A Nice Day.

I think. I mean, it wasn’t bad.

2:04am

So, I didn’t do any World Quests today. I may do that tomorrow, we will see. I will be doing more Fallout 76, that’s for sure. I got three hours in today, so that was pretty nice. The video of the stream is in the post below this one.

For some reason, I can’t access the site through the VPN again. This isn’t the first time that that’s happened. Hopefully, it will fix itself soon enough.

I updated my video drivers today, and it actually wanted me to reboot the computer. When I did that, a bunch of other stuff updated. Steam, Origin, Spotify, Discord, and I think something else, as well. It was update madness. I guess that maybe I should reboot more often.

I didn’t really do a whole lot else today. I suppose that’s not necessarily a bad thing, but you’d think I could have at least done something. Like those World Quests, perhaps.

Oh yeah, GeForce Experience and StreamLabs OBS also both updated today, but not when I restarted.

You know, at one point yesterday evening, I had actually thought about playing WoW for a while on my Paladin, but then…I just kept kinda putting it off. Then I did the music thing, and that was that.

I know the end of this is kinda disjointed, but I just typed up what popped into my head there for a minute or two. I suppose I’m pretty much done at this point. I can’t think of anything else to add. Although, I don’t know if I mentioned that I actually put the doorknob on the door to the front room. It went pretty easy, and is much nicer than the way we were doing it after the old doorknob broke. Kinda wish I had done that sooner. 

Okay, I think I’m done now. I’m sure I’ll be back tomorrow, if for no other reason than to post up the next video. Ciao for now.

Hi There.

I’m a little drunk.

3:38am

I’m not as drunk as I would like, and my bottle is empty.

I don’t have a whole lot to say tonight. I did do my World Quests tonight. Well, I did them earlier today. That’s twice in the past few days. I’m gonna get them done. I swear.

I’m getting close. Really, I am. It’s gonna take longer than I thought, but I will get it done. At least, I’m pretty sure I will.

I don’t have a whole lot to say tonight. I’ve been drinking, but not enough to be really drunk, which is sad. I’ve spent tonight drinking and listening to music. Some good, and some bad. I suppose it really doesn’t matter at this point.

I need to go to bed soon. I’m not even sure what my point was for posting this, but here I am.

I’m going to sign off now. Maybe I can go to bed and be happy, but last night…well, last night was weird. I’m not going to talk about it, because you really don’t want to know. It was pretty fucked up.

Tonight, though, I’m gonna go to bed, and hope that I don’t have dreams lie last night. Good night.

My Life.

It ain’t great.

12:17am

I’ve been sitting here for a little while debating on whether to post this, or what to post. I’m not even sure where to start. Some, or maybe even most of it, I’ve mentioned before. Some not. I guess I’ll just start typing and see where it goes. Here we go.

I’m on disability. That means I get a monthly check from Social Security. I only get so much a month, and it’s, of course, a fair bit less than I made when I was working. Literally half of my check goes to the house payment. The other half goes towards the bills. Realistically, I have no money for groceries, alcohol, meds, or anything else.

So, you may wonder how I pay for those other things. I don’t. Right now, my mom does. That’s pretty unfair of me, though. She’s 75 and doesn’t need to be paying my way at this point, but I don’t really have a choice. Plus, she got rid of her fairly lucrative job for a lower paying one. That’s not gonna help.

Any food I get, I get because of her. My meds, her. My alcohol, her. How do I pay for World Of Warcraft? Birthday present. How do I pay for weed? I don’t right now. 

Could I change that? I’m not sure. I can’t get a roommate. I mean, supposedly Cable still lives here, but I’ve barely seen him in the past couple weeks. Even if I had a room free, I’m afraid of people, and having a stranger move into the house would probably stress me out so badly that I would end up in the hospital. Or worse.

I could, theoretically, sell the house and move into a rent-controlled apartment. Of course, I would have to figure out how to pay closing costs. I’d also need to pay for a storage room for most of my stuff. That would eat into any possible savings I would get from downsizing. Not to mention that I would most likely be on a waiting list first, and who knows how long that might take.

Speaking of savings, I have none. I don’t even have a savings account. I also don’t have a vehicle. Haven’t for almost two years, and I have no way to get one. There’s probably no way I would get a loan, and I have no way to pay for it anyways.

You may wonder why I don’t just move in with my mom. Well, I can’t. Her house is already full. I’m on the outside looking in, as it were.

My computer is six years old, my phone nearly so. I have no way to replace either of them. If my phone dies, I just have no phone. If my computer dies, all I have is the Chromebook, and it doesn’t exactly play games.

So, what about the rest of my family? They don’t really acknowledge me. Never really have, for the mostpart. Friends? I have Auren, who’s been busy busting my chops over Fallout 76 all week, and another guy, who I have heard from like..twice this year.

I don’t have much. Well, I mean, I have things, but…well, you kinda get the idea. I have video games, but without the meds, it’s a lot harder to do anything.

I feel like I’m reaching a breaking point. The problem is, things aren’t gonna break my way.

I’m not even sure if there’s a point to me posting this. It’s not like anyone is gonna read it. Auren, maybe, but that’s about it. I don’t get views here. I don’t get people watching on Twitch when I stream. I don’t get more than like two views of a minute when I put shit on YouTube.

My life is not great. And people would say ‘Well, you have to make it better.’ Of course, they would neglect to say how, because I sure as hell don’t know how to do it. If I did, I may not be in this position.

I suppose that’s all I have for now. My story is not a happy story, when you get down to brass tacks. Sure, there were a few good things here and there, but by and large…well, you get the idea.

I’ll probably be back tomorrow. Talking about what, I’m not sure. I guess we’ll see.

Mod Followup.

It’s weird.

11:16pm

So, I disabled everything, and reabled them a few at a time, and I never found a mod that was causing a problem. I have them all enabled now, just like I did before, but now it seems to be working fine. Color me confused.

Of course, I didn’t actually play after I got through all that, but I didn’t even start working on it again today until a little before dinner time. I was just kinda hanging out and not doing much. I seem to do that more often now that I don’t have my meds.

I need to work on getting those back. It would be nice, but fucking 8 in the morning. That’s crazy to me. I haven’t really been awake at that time for years. Gonna have to change that, though, I guess.

I really don’t have much else going on right now. Well, I’m downloading a Fallout 76 patch that apparently came out before the last beta day. In a few days, though, I’m going to have to download another, bigger patch.

I’m thinking about going and laying down with the Chromebook. I’m cold, and the bed will be warm. Well, it won’t be right away, but my comforter is warm enough, so it would probably be toasty pretty soon.

Also, my clothes drying rack broke last night. I didn’t even fall on it or anything. As a matter of fact, it happened while I was asleep last night. Now I gotta get another one. I suppose I don’t have to right away, I can use the shower curtain rod for now, but I would like to have my rack back. I usually have it sitting by the bed to block the light from the other room, not that there is much. We’ll see what it’s like without it.

I am giving myself until the end of the month to get Void Elves unlocked. Not sure what I’ll do to punish myself if I don’t, but you would think that I could come up with something. I just need to push myself into getting back into Argus for a few days. It’s really not too far off, just gotta do it.

I suppose that’s about all I have right now. I can’t think of much anything else to say. I did want to get something posted tonight, though. It seemed like a good idea. Not sure what I will be doing tomorrow, it’s football day. I assume I won’t be doing much from like 1-4 tomorrow, besides watching the Colts game.

Okay, I am off now.